On Sept. 12, Apple placed a news release about the iPhone 5 on their website. Its 14 paragraphs describe the new features, design and pricing. The goal was an official statement from Apple about the new product so everyone receives the same correct information.
In the first paragraph, the writer repeats the descriptions from paragraph one, but the descriptions are now quoted. It makes the reader question the writer’s AP style and creativity. Also, part of the quote is incorrectly punctuated, which again serves to discredit the writer. The quote itself too is opinionated and biased, but that can be expected as it is clearly endorsed and written by Apple employees.
The descriptive paragraphs each contain a high number of adjectives. The writers for Apple want to create excitement and buzz for their product, which explains the loose writing. However, adjectives are repeated, which takes away from the excitement and makes the writing monotonous.
The writing throughout is not tight writing and the language is more complex than news writing. The bias is evident but expected because it is on their website. On the positive side, the news release can be easily scanned as each paragraph begins with the topic feature. Also, the headline is specific and context free. The deck between the headline and the body creates intrigue and suspense to trap the reader.
Overall the news release does not follow expected AP style. However, the audience intended is readers of the Apple website, not journalists. It serves to inform people interested in Apple but does not offer unbiased, well-rounded information.